8/13/2017 0 Comments HVFH ArticleFor this week's blog, I am so incredibly excited to share my first published piece with herviewfromhome.com!
Please consider clicking the link below, reading, and sharing. If this article does well, I will be added as a regular contributor to the online magazine and begin realizing my dream of becoming a professional writer! http://herviewfromhome.com/how-a-middle-school-track-meet-set-me-on-an-unhealthy-course/ A staple product in almost every deli in the Pittsburgh area is Isaly’s Chipped Chopped Ham. It is the lunch meat equivalent of a hot dog, using the absolute worst grade of meat allowed by health code standards. The meat itself is marbled with fat, allowing for no pretense that it might be even slightly healthy. It is also cheap. Isaly’s is generally served slathered in barbeque sauce within a hamburger bun. Also cheap. When it’s all said and done, a satisfying meal consisting of Isaly’s barbecue sandwiches and maybe some store brand potato chips could feed a family of four for no more than $10 and a clogged artery or two. I grew up in New Castle, PA, a city with a population of about 22,000 people, located an hour north of Pittsburgh. New Castle was once a thriving area economically, but with the decline of its limestone industry, unemployment and financial instability is commonplace. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the average per capita income between 2011 and 2015 was $19,206, leaving about 28 percent of the city’s population in poverty. My family fell into that category, but my brother and I were always provided for: a roof over our heads, heat in the winter, running water, and a hot meal on the table every evening. Of course, the rent and utilities bills were of the highest priority when it came to our finances. Inevitably, that provided a very small budget for food.
Isaly’s served as an incredibly affordable way to feed a family on a tight budget, and a weekly meal for ours. Along with this savory pork product, you were likely to find any of the following items in our home on a typical day: -cereal -potato chips -crinkle cut french fries -ground chuck -frozen pot pies -rice -pasta -saltines -hot dogs -white bread -peanut butter & jelly -boxed macaroni and cheese You might be thinking that this list doesn’t seem so bad, and you would be right if it went on to include healthy items like fresh vegetables, poultry, and fruits. But when these items are the primary foods within a person’s diet, it is a recipe for poor health and weight gain. I remember walking through the grocery store with my mom one evening. It was payday, and in my mind that meant an endless pot of funds just waiting to be spent. I loved chicken, but it was not often something in which we had the pleasure of indulging. I asked her with my best attempt at looking adorable if we could have chicken for dinner. I could see her considering it. She walked up to the cooler that held the meats and stared at the package for a long time. I didn’t know why then, but now I do. She was checking the price. With a sincere look of regret on her face, she said, “Not tonight.” Most people would not hesitate to buy a staple food item like chicken, nor would they feel the need to check the price on the package. But for the family that is making just enough money to get by, the difference between a $2 pack of hot dogs and $3.50/pound for chicken is also the difference between being able to keep the electricity on in the following month or not. Faced with this situation, the majority of people would make the same decision: electricity is more important than high priced foods. Unfortunately, in our society almost all of the foods that are healthy fall into this realm of high priced foods: lean meats, fresh produce (especially fruits), and foods with good fats like almonds and avocados. Imagine having to buy those items for a family of four to eat three meals a day for two weeks on only a $100 budget. You couldn’t. Period. So, the options for poor families are fatty, processed, unhealthy food, or nothing at all. This leads to a vicious cycle of problems that can impede a healthy lifestyle, both as a child and as an adult. Some of these implications are obvious: weight gain, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, etc. Certainly one of the reasons that I already weighed 130 lbs in 3rd grade is because of the foods I was eating at home. When I was about 14, I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. At age 15, and then again at 17, I spent entire days in the hospital as doctors tested blood and urine samples for glucose levels to determine that I was borderline diabetic. The doctors cited being overweight as the direct cause for all of these health problems. At 25, I spent more time in surrounded by the sterile walls of the doctor’s office than I’d like to admit, fighting off multiple cold and sinus infections, and once even pneumonia. My immune system was terrible, and the wimpy medications that the doctor prescribed were hard pressed to alleviate the symptoms. But because my blood pressure was high, I could not take the “good stuff.” My doctor bluntly told me that I would continue to experience health problems until I lost some weight. However, when I embarked on my weightloss journey, it became quite apparent to me that I really had no idea HOW to eat healthily. In my adult life, I continued to eat like a poor child because it is what I knew and understood. Even five years later, I sometimes question whether or not something is healthy. I’m not trying to convey a sob story about being unhealthy when I was overweight, but to give a personal example of the unfortunate circumstances low income families face when it comes to nutrition. We sometimes judge overweight people when we see them eating unhealthy foods, and assume that they are eating in such a way because they do not care about their health. While I’m sure this might be accurate in some cases, have you ever considered that those eating habits are a result of their financial circumstances? That the $1 Isaly’s BBQ ham sandwich and 50 cent serving of potato chips that they are eating is all that they could afford? I am fortunate. As an adult, I have the financial freedom to buy more expensive foods and I have used that luxury to learn how to eat properly. Not everyone has that opportunity. Are there ways to maintain a healthy diet on a low budget? Maybe. But in a family in which the parents work multiple jobs and long hours while trying to do the best they can for their children, learning how to do so is probably not a priority. Part of this problem unfortunately lies with the food retail industry. No one is asking food companies to sell caviar and veal for the same price as pre-made hamburger patties, but there should be healthier food options available for families on a tight budget. Our country’s obesity epidemic is constantly in the limelight, yet very few people take into consideration the foundations of bad eating habits. Until these foundations are stabilized, nothing will change. 7/28/2017 0 Comments True CrossFit AthletesThe Shenandoah CrossFit crew after completing the Memorial Day "Murph" workout (Run 1 mile, 100 pull ups, 200 push ups, 300 squats, run 1 mile) at 9:00 a.m. 85 people spent the morning of their holiday getting fit and honoring a fallen soldier. It’s about that time of year again. CrossFit enthusiasts around the world are gearing up to watch the equivalent of the Olympics for our sport: The CrossFit Games.
We will sit in front of our televisions and wait at the edge of our seats for the announcement of each WOD (Workout of the Day), and, true to form for CrossFit, cheer on ALL of the athletes competing. We will observe in amazement as athletes perform movements that the typical CrossFitter may never be able to do over the course of his/her training. We will fervently discuss the execution of each workout: how it could have been done more effectively, when a particular athlete either excelled or failed, and whether or not we agree with the rankings. However, at the end of the day, one thing will be true for all of us: we will look up to the professional athletes who have put their abilities to the ultimate test in attempt to gain the coveted title of the “Fittest on Earth.” I remember watching the CrossFit Open Announcements in 2016 better than any of the others I’ve seen. For those of you who are not familiar with the Open, the competitors for The CrossFit Games each year are chosen from an initial pool of hundreds of thousands of athletes participating in an open competition. Literally anyone can sign up for the Open, complete the workouts, and post scores. The top scores from there move on to regionals, and then to The CrossFit Games. The Open includes 5 workouts, which are announced weekly. The announcement itself includes information about the workout, but also features two established CrossFit athletes who complete the workout right then and there. In 2016, each Open announcement included your “average Joe” athletes working out alongside the professional athletes. I LOVED this idea and I was so bummed when they did not continue doing it in the 2017 Open. I specifically remember watching the very first announcement that year. “The 6th- and 8th-ranked women from the 2015 Reebok CrossFit Games, Chyna Cho and Emily Abbott, [took] on the workout alongside two employees from Western Digital Corporation (WDC).” Naturally, I sat in awe as I watched Cho and Abbott pound through 20 minutes of chest to bar pull ups, overhead walking lunges, and bar facing burpees. Everyone viewing during those moments had high expectations for these athletes, and knew all about them: their names, their athletic backgrounds, where they lived, where they trained. There were no mysteries or surprises attached to them, and therefore no shock in the fact that they absolutely killed the workout. Every now and again during the stream, the cameramen would catch the other two athletes, Scott and Jo, in the shot. Aside from the limited information offered during their very brief introductions, I had no idea who they were. I didn’t know what they did for work at WDC or how many hours they spent there each day; I didn’t know if they had families at home, a sick parent to tend to, or medical challenges; I didn’t know anything about their athletic backgrounds, or perhaps the lack thereof. What I did know was this: Scott and Jo embodied what it meant to be a true CrossFit athlete. I have no doubt in my mind that being a professional athlete is a grueling journey. It comes with incredible stress, both on the body and the mind, and requires a significant amount of dedication. However, the typical CrossFitter does not get sponsored or paid to train day in and day out like the professional competitors we see at The CrossFit Games. Instead, they are people who have jobs entirely separate from their athletic training that likely require them to work 8 hours a day. They take care of families, cook dinner each night, do laundry on Saturdays, and grocery shop at Costco on Sundays. They balance their checkbooks, take their kids to soccer practice, and make sure the dog gets his daily walk. They are the people who find time to get to the gym, even if it means sacrificing the only free hour they have in a day. Like many CrossFit facilities, there is a “whiteboard” where I train. Each day, we record our times, our personal records, and our notes regarding performance on an app called SugarWod. Others from our gym can view these things, comment, and “fistbump” their fellow CrossFitters. One thing that I absolutely love about this is seeing the progress people have made. I feel a true sense of pride and excitement when I see that someone who couldn’t deadlift more than 75 pounds when she started just did a full workout with 155 pounds on her bar, or when someone who has been consistently working on pull ups writes that she got one or two during the warm up. These are the rock stars in our CrossFit community. They come in before and after work, on their lunch breaks, on the weekends, whenever they can fit it in, and they work hard to EARN every bit of progress that they see. As the clock continued to count down the minutes until the first open workout of 2016 was over, the top of the screen displayed each rep accumulated by the pro athletes. Cho and Abbott only barely showed signs of fatigue, but it was clear that Scott and Jo were pushing the limitations of their fitness. But they did not stop. I had no idea how many reps they had, but they were the competitors for whom I was cheering. They, just like every other “average Joe” that goes to gyms around the world each day, encourage me to remain dedicated to this crazy thing we call CrossFit. They are the true faces of CrossFit. They are the true superheroes of this sport, and I am so lucky to have the opportunity to work next to them each day. 7/22/2017 0 Comments Find Your Fitness PassionIt’s 3:30 p.m., and the last of my students are filtering out of my classroom for the day. I wait a few more minutes before grabbing my gym bag and heading to the faculty bathroom to change into my workout gear. I take my time, telling myself that the school sports teams need a few minutes to get settled in the weight room and claim the equipment they need before I can go in and take my usual position on the elliptical machine. In reality, I am moving slowly because I have absolutely no motivation to find myself positioned behind the same windows, using the same footholds and handles, and staring at the same progress screen that I have seen every other day this week.
But I will go anyway, and get my 60 minutes of daily cardio out of the way. It is a task that I have to complete, just like putting in my 8 hours at work, cooking dinner, and paying bills. I make a beeline to the first open elliptical machine in the school’s weight room, plug in my headphones, turn Metallica on full blast, and, as I begin moving the handles and pedals, I block out all of the activity happening around me. I glance down at the progress monitor. It’s only been 10 minutes. My pace on the elliptical is fast enough that I am sweating and my breathing is mildly heavy, but I’m not really pushing harder than I do on any other day. Trudging through the full hour is arduous, but I manage to do so successfully, wiping down the handles of the machine and hightailing it out of the gym just as quickly as I came in. This was my daily exercise routine for a year. There was nothing fun about it, and nothing to motivate me to return to it other than necessity. Each day that I walked the long hallway from my classroom to the school’s gym, I could feel my feet moving more slowly. How long would it be until they halted completely? I had already resigned myself to the fact that exercising would have to be a regular part of my life if I wanted to continue losing weight and then maintain, but the way I felt about working out when I was heavy had not changed at all: I still hated it. In conversation with a coworker, I mentioned my fear of losing all motivation to go to exercise. She suggested that I go to her gym and give it a try. “It’s not CrossFit, but similar in many ways, and it is different every day.” “Oh no! There’s no way I can do CrossFit. That stuff looks crazy!” Finally, she convinced me to go with her. I had so much fun, that I went back every day that week! I thought that this must be the place for me….until the owner announced that they would be closing the gym. Now, my “Oh no!” was spoken for a much different reason. I couldn’t go back to a workout routine in which I just went through the motions, but I really didn’t feel like I was ready for the physical and financial commitment that came with joining a CrossFit facility. After some serious peer pressure from a few friends, I booked my free trial class at Shenandoah CrossFit in Winchester, VA. A friend from work agreed to go with me so that I didn’t have an excuse to back out. When I walked through those doors for the first time, I was simultaneously intimidated and surprised. The class was doing squats, but the weights they used varied from one person using only a barbell to another using what looked like 400 pounds. Contrary to what I expected, the clients were all average looking people, as opposed to raging hulklike bodybuilders throwing around tires. A coach approached us, showed us around, had us sign some paperwork, and then got us started. Our workout consisted of this: 21 kettlebell swings 21 situps 100 foot shuttle run 15 kettlebell swings 15 situps 100 foot shuttle run 9 kettlebell swings 9 situps 100 foot shuttle run It wasn’t so bad. In fact, it was fun, and I performed way better than I thought I would (I didn’t even puke, despite the fact that all of the CrossFit naysayers cite this as a typical consequence of such rigorous physical activity). I started to feel like I might be comfortable in this environment, and signed up right then and there. Now, I cannot imagine my life without CrossFit. Every single day is different and challenges me. Even on my very worst days, I can’t wait to get myself to the gym. I finally found enthusiasm for fitness, and I don’t foresee losing that any time soon. My point here is not necessarily to shove CrossFit down your throat. I realize that not everyone will be passionate about CrossFit. You might fall in love with running or cycling or even Zumba, and all of those are excellent ways to become physically fit. My point is that working out should not feel like a chore, and when it does, it is time for something new. Our world already provides us with plenty of excuses to skip a workout, and when you dread exercising, it is much more likely that you will not do it at all. So the goal is to find something that you look forward to doing each day, something that is more like recreation versus obligation. When you find a workout regimen that you truly love, so too will you discover a lifelong dedication to fitness. I have found that love and dedication in CrossFit. In what will you find yours? 7/16/2017 0 Comments Perceptions of ImperfectionsThis one is personal. I don’t want to create this internet persona of living in a state of perpetual positivity, so I think it is important that you all realize that, despite having some wisdom on these topics, I still experience moments of doubt regarding my body image. One of the things that has plagued me for a long time is something I did not expect to happen as I lost weight. When I began this journey, I had the naive image of the tight, hot bod that I would have once I reached my goal weight. Unfortunately for me, I never took into consideration the way the human body reacts to extreme weight gain followed my extreme weight loss. When you grab a brand new, uninflated balloon from the package, the material has a lot of resistance. You can stretch it and pull it in every direction, but it’s almost impossible to understand how that small piece of latex can inflate to be 10 times it’s current size. Yet, when you begin to inflate it, the balloon accommodates the added air to contain it to a certain extent. However, when the balloon is again deflated, the latex appears shriveled, never again to return to it’s initially resistant elasticity. Just as a balloon expands to contain more air, so too does human skin expand to contain fat from weight gain. And just as the balloon can never again regain the tautness it once had, nor can your skin. The result is the dreaded “sag.” My workout regimen requires me to not only participate in cardiovascular activities, but also lift weights. This combination would allow the typical person to become leaner, more “cut,” perhaps even get that coveted six pack. For me, that is not the case. This has been my strongest point of self consciousness since I began losing weight. For both myself and others, there is a huge discrepancy between how I should look and how I do look. First impressions are typically made solely on appearance, and I try my best to dress myself well. I can pull off those tight party dresses that I wear to my husband’s company Christmas parties each year, but not without spanx. I will wear a bikini, but only if the bottoms are high waisted. And I wear spandex leggings to the gym every single day, but you’ll never see me work out in shorts. Especially when I decided to reenter the dating scene, this became an issue for me. Like many adults with busy lives, I turned to online dating to meet new people. I’m not opposed to this option whatsoever, and in fact, I met my husband online. However, online dating is based almost solely on superficiality: we choose the people with whom we’d like to communicate based on a few photos and a brief description of themselves that likely highlights only their positive traits. My profile, of course, emphasized my success with weight loss and my love for CrossFit. The typical introductory message that I received from another member included complimentary accolades like, “Wow! You do CrossFit!” or “That’s a lot of weight to lose!” Inevitably, however, those messages tended to digress into comments like, “With how often you work out, I bet you are solid” or “You’re so hot in your pictures, I bet you have a great body.” Based on my perspective, neither of these things were true, and it made me so self conscious that I tended to “settle” for men who I thought might accept my physical flaws. Unfortunately, I tended to incorrectly assess their personalities and ended up with men who did not meet my expectations for how I hoped to be treated. For a long while, the reality of this situation made me somewhat depressed. I directly correlated my lack of success with men to my physical appearance. More often than I’d like to count, I’ve heard myself saying, “I wish my body appropriately reflected all of the work I put in at the gym,” or “I have bat wings, not arms,” or worst of all, “My saggy skin is my punishment for allowing my weight to get so out of control in the first place.” These statements were toxic and diminished the important progress that I had made toward being healthier, not just thinner. I fixated on the problem areas that no one other than myself could see instead of allowing myself to be proud of the extraordinary accomplishments that I had made. I started to consider more drastic approaches to remedying this, namely surgery. There were a few issues with this approach that made me hesitate. First, and foremost, was the cost. I was a single woman living on a teacher’s salary while paying off student loans, a mortgage, and a car payment. There was no conceivable way that I could afford to pay for skin removal procedures, even if I focused on one area at a time (thighs, arms, midsection, etc.). Second, my dedication to CrossFit had allowed me to meet so many physical goals of which I was proud, both in terms of strength and performance. The recovery time required for such a surgery would no doubt result in losing those gains, only to have to start all of that hard work from the beginning once I was allowed to return to the gym. Furthermore, my inability to engage in physical activity after having been so active for so long, would likely result in weight gain. I could envision myself becoming so overwhelmed with these digressions that I might give up altogether. And for what? My reasons for considering surgery were rooted completely in vanity. My saggy skin did not impede my daily activities, was not a health risk, and was easily disguised when I wanted it to be. I decided that surgery was not the route I wanted to take. With this in mind, the only viable option was to begin accepting myself for who I had become and realize that all of those vain expectations that I had for myself affected only a small percentage of my life. I spent so much time concerned with how I looked in a bikini or a mini skirt, without realizing that I spend only a few days each year dawning these items...so why was I obsessing over them? If logically it did not make sense to change the imperfections that I developed as I lost weight, it also did not logically make sense to put time and emotional effort into worrying about them. I had to change my mentality. Instead of thinking of my saggy skin as a punishment for previous unhealthy behaviors, I started to think of it as a badge of honor for the progress I’ve made toward being a healthier me, but also as a reminder that I have a long way to go. Using this manner of thinking has helped me to not only be proud of my accomplishments, but also to continue working toward my own wellness. Does that mean that I have set foot on the path of positivity and optimism without ever looking back? No. To say that I have would be foolish and unrealistic. But each day I am getting closer to having both feet firmly planted on its pavement. So how does this apply to those of you who are reading? Does this mean that you will have saggy skin after losing weight, as well? Maybe. Maybe not. But there will inevitably be something that changes about your body that you did not expect and that you do not like. Don’t allow whatever that thing is to diminish the journey on which you have embarked. Hard work and dedication are far superior to physical perfection, and exhibiting these traits makes others blind to what you might perceive as flaws. 7/9/2017 0 Comments Weighted Perspective*Disclaimer: The lovely lady featured in this photo is NOT me, but I keep this image as a reminder that the number on the scale does not always accurately reflect one's level of health, fitness, or beauty. For the last year, I have consistently weighed between 170 and 180 pounds. I track my food intake diligently and work out 5-6 days each week. A few months ago, likely in a haze of raging hormones, I broke down after standing on the scale and, yet again, seeing a number that fell in between that range. “What am I doing WRONG? How can I work THIS hard and not even lose a pound!” Being the kindhearted realist that he is, my husband tried to quell my emotional reaction with delicately communicated logic. “Honey, muscle weighs more than fat. You’ve been going hard. Just because you haven’t lost weight, doesn’t mean you haven’t made progress.”
I tried to make sense of his statement, but it was clouded by the screaming voices that set societal standards of health and beauty: magazines, movies, television...even doctors. These sources ingrain within us all at a very young age that we should uphold the scale as though it is some God, omnisciently designating a numerical value on which we should base our self worth. While the number on the scale does hold some merit in terms of progress, it is not the be all and end all factor. Yes, if all of your clothes suddenly feel too tight, and the scale says that you’ve gained 20 pounds, you should probably reevaluate your diet and exercise regimen. However, it is also possible that you might step on the scale, see that you’ve gained 20 pounds, and yet your clothes fit just the same...maybe even better. When I started CrossFit in January of 2013, I was at my lightest weight: 150 pounds. However, for the first time in my life, I was weightlifting. I had never even touched a barbell up until this point! As you might imagine, all of the muscles that I had been neglecting to strengthen over the years began to grow, and they did so quickly. It was with incredible surprise then, that my doctor noted my weight in June of 2013 as 175 pounds: 25 pounds heavier than I had been 6 months prior. His immediate reaction was to tell me that I needed to lose weight. According to the BMI, I had gone from “overweight” to “obese.” “Ok, but I started doing some weightlifting in January.” “It doesn’t matter...you should not weigh so much.” I asked him if he would take my measurements and compare them to what they had been the last time I visited. “You’ve lost 2 inches around your waist,” he said. “So, what should I take from this? What do I need to do?” “You should decrease your calorie intake and lose at least 25 pounds.” I was devastated. I went home in tears, skipped dinner, and went straight to bed. The next day, I went to my gym in a panic, cornered the head coach, and asked him a ton of questions: Is this normal for someone who is doing CrossFit? Is there something I can do with my diet to lose the weight I’ve gained? Can the muscle I’ve put on really weigh 25 pounds? Should I lift less weight? Should I do more cardio? “Look!” he stopped me in my tracks. “How do you feel?” “What do you mean?” “How are your clothes fitting? What is your energy level like? Do you FEEL healthy?” I had to think about this for a minute. I noticed a few changes in the way my clothing fit: I had to get rid of a few pairs of skinny jeans and a blazer or two to accommodate my growing biceps and shoulders. Aside from that, however, I was wearing pretty much the same things that I was when I was 25 pounds lighter. My energy level was much better throughout the day, allowing me to cut down on the coffee I guzzled for necessity rather than pleasure. And certainly, I felt healthier. I told my coach this, and he responded, ”Then stop worrying about the scale.” So, instead of weighing myself religiously twice each week, I now weigh myself once a month (if I feel so compelled to do so). You might be asking yourself how a girl who meticulously recorded pounds lost for almost 3 years did a complete 180 in terms of using the scale. It was a bumpy transition, that is certain, but once I stopped caring so much about the numbers on the scale, I started to realize all of the progress that I was missing while I bowed down at that digital alter. Yes, I may weigh 25 pounds more than when I began CrossFit, and I may be “stuck” at that number, but here are some things that have not stagnated:
I could go on, but I think you get the idea. The things I’ve listed above are SO much more significant than any number of pounds that I weigh at a given moment. They cannot be assessed by some bogus piece of equipment that varies measurements from machine to machine, nor can they be undermined by a doctor who uses an outdated chart to determine a patient’s wellness. They reflect hard work, perseverance, and determination, and they translate positively into other facets of life. At the end of the day, these are the things that show success, and these are the things on which we should focus. 7/2/2017 0 Comments Crimes Against NutritionA friend of mine approached me on Memorial Day this year and wanted to ask a few questions about how I handle my nutrition. “For example,” she said, “it’s a holiday and I am going to be surrounded by all kinds of foods I want, but shouldn’t eat. It’s really hard to resist that temptation.” She’s absolutely right. After all of the years that I have been watching the way I eat, there are still certain things that are difficult to say “no” to when they are directly in front of me. “So what do you do in those situations?” she asked.
I have a few thoughts on this, some of which you may not expect. Just to be clear, I may have a lot of experience in terms of losing and maintaining weight, but I am certainly no stranger to crimes against nutrition, and if there were a fine for them, I would be sitting in the corner of a dingy prison cell for not being able to pay for mine. Here’s why... 1. I allow myself to commit myself to commit crimes against nutrition; sometimes it feels good to be bad. All of you who are reading this are human beings (I think), and being human comes with inevitable imperfection. And let’s face it, sometimes we desire to do those things that make us imperfect. For example, as much as I know that alcohol is bad for me, I still enjoy a glass of wine (or two) each night. If there is a sign that tells me not to touch something, I am probably going to touch it. I don’t even blink an eye when I jaywalk (I know...I am a terrible person). There are LOTS of temptations for humans to resist, but I think it’s safe to say that the source of most of those temptations is food. I do not advocate for finding an excuse to break your dieting laws on a daily basis, but on some occasions, it is acceptable. At least once each year while I am visiting family, my mom will offer to make homemade Lebanese food: grape leaves, garlic sauce, kibbeh... mmmmmmmmm. I’m sorry, but if I have the rare opportunity to have my favorite food made with the love and care of my mother’s hand, I’m taking it. And I won’t regret it. 2. Sometimes I premeditate my crimes, and even though this may be frowned upon in the court of law, I consider it a better strategy. Last year, I married my husband. About 4 months prior to our wedding date, we booked our honeymoon in St. Maarten. There was no way I was going to sit in front of my phone for that entire week and record everything I ate. Nor was I going to pass up the opportunity to try foods that were unique to the area. So, on the day we booked our trip, I dedicated myself to strictly following my nutrition plan without faltering. For those 4 months, I was a nutrition nazi. As a result, I had no qualms about sitting on the beach with my piña coladas, eating real Caribbean food, and, best of all, enjoying authentic French pastries and coffees each morning on the French side of the island. 3. When I commit my crimes, I plead guilty and endure the consequences because I know that they do not have to appear on my permanent record. I have the choice to “rehabilitate” myself in light of my crimes. Using the example of my honeymoon once more, you might imagine what the result of eating so poorly for a week was: I gained weight. I knew that would happen. I expected it. When I returned from my trip and stepped on the scale, I’ll admit to having a mild meltdown. Just as quickly, though, I sucked it up and returned to the same nutrition plan I had used prior to my honeymoon. Within just a few days, I was shedding those pounds that I had gained. I could have made the choice to dwell on those few pounds, but what good would that have done? To err is human, to forgive, divine, right? Perhaps you gave into some of your food temptations. So what? Pick up the pieces, make a plan to fix it, forgive yourself, and move on. 4. Throughout the course of my “criminal activity,” I typically learn a few lessons about the way that my body reacts to my hedonistic behaviors. As a teacher, I tend to value lessons learned even more so sometimes than goals met. Again, looking at the example of my honeymoon, I know that a week of debauchery will result in some negative side effects, despite the fact that I was so strict for many weeks prior. As a result, when preparing for vacation this year, I was again strict in my diet plan. However, throughout the week, I made “good” choices. I did not necessarily restrict my dietary habits to what I might eat on a regular basis, but I was conscious of maintaining a good balance. For example, at one restaurant I ordered a combo platter that came with steak and shrimp. I requested for the shrimp to be grilled, and I set aside the fries once I was done with the meat. Was it the healthiest meal ever? No, but I ate the healthier part of the meal and sacrificed the most unhealthy part. I left the restaurant feeling both satisfied and unrestricted in the choices that I made for myself. I would venture to say that I stay within the dietary restrictions I set forth for myself about 90% of the time. However, I feel no guilt for the other 10% of my life during which I actively choose to participate in crimes against nutrition. But if I am so dedicated to being healthy, how could I possibly feel no guilt for this? Because when I am on my deathbed in several years, I also want to be able to say that I lived my life to the fullest. Although some might disagree, part of doing this thing called life is enjoying particular cuisines that may not fall within the confines of your daily eating habits. This might include eating foods unique to an area to which you have never traveled; it may mean not feeling anxiety attached to a regimented diet while on vacation; hell, it may just mean allowing yourself to enjoy that cheeseburger on Memorial Day. Regardless of the the reason for your crimes, you alone are the judge and jury choosing your sentence. If you feel the need to “be bad,” do it--in moderation. And if your sentence includes digressions from your goals, accept them, do a little “community service” by cleaning the junk food out of your pantry, and move on with your life. 6/25/2017 0 Comments What Size Are You?One of the questions I dreaded answering the most in school had absolutely nothing to do with academics: “What size t-shirt do you wear?” I was a very involved student, and inevitably, every single club and activity required a t-shirt. I hated it. Why? Because it was also inevitable that the method of ordering said t-shirt was a teeny-tiny, bubbly girl walking around with a clipboard and sign up sheet, asking people for their sizes and recording them in front of everyone else. When that girl came up to me, I always faced a soul crushing internal struggle regarding how to handle the situation. Option 1: I could save face and order a smaller size than I actually needed, but never wear the shirt. The problem: It was pretty clear that I didn’t fit into a small or medium, so my peers would know I was ordering the wrong size, and if I ordered a large (still too small), they would judge me for having to wear such a big size. Option 2: I could mumble my size quietly to the girl taking orders. The problem: She’d probably ask me to speak up, in which case everyone would be MORE focused on my answer than they initially had been. It would also be incredibly clear to those around me that I was ordering a size with which I was uncomfortable. No one mumbles that they need a size small t-shirt. Option 3: I could tell her I was not ordering a t-shirt at all. The problem: “Gasp! You don’t want to show your affiliation with our club?!” or “If you don’t order a t-shirt, you can’t participate in _______ event” or “But everyone else is ordering one…” Option 4: Just tell her that I need a size XXL and own it. The problem: No one in high school has developed the confidence to “own” the things about which they are insecure. I usually went with some sort of combination of the above. Usually, I mumbled that I needed a size XL, which was a little too small, but with some stretching before I donned it and some not-so-subtle tugging throughout the day, I could make it work. Even today, when I am a thinner and much more confident version of myself, I feel an initial panic when I am asked to order a t-shirt. But why? Why does revealing one’s clothing size produce so many negative emotions? As a society, we often use this to make an assessment regarding body image. The smaller the size, the prouder we are of our bodies. Conversely, the larger the size, the more embarrassed we are. Working in a high school, I cannot tell you how many girls I see parading around in their size 0 jeans and bragging about the size on the tag. But do I ever hear a young lady who wears a size 10 announcing it? No. That would never happen. Attaching any value at all to a clothing size is absolutely obnoxious in today’s society. Clothing companies have skewed what sizes mean so much that there is no way to pinpoint a person’s “size.” When I go to Old Navy, for example, I can easily fit into a size small t-shirt, and sometimes even x-small. However, I generally need to look for a size 10 or 12 pair of jeans. If I hop over to WalMart, I’m probably going to find jeans in a size 6 or 8 that fit me. When ordering from LulaRoe, I can buy an x-small maxi dress, but I have to wear tall & curvy leggings. The pant sizes in my closet range from anywhere between a size 4 and a size 14. My top sizes range from x-small to x-large. So what size do I wear? Well, I guess I wear a size x-smarge OR a 468101214 (shout out to my friend Chris for helping me figure out what to call it!). I know I am not the only one, and I have accepted that clothing sizing is about as consistent as gas prices across the United States. Yet, there are still days when I leave a dressing room feeling a sense of failure or discouragement because I couldn’t squeeze my healthy-sized badonkadonk into a size 6 pair of jeans, or because my biceps and shoulders make me hulk out of that size small. It took me a very long time to accept that the size on the label of my clothing is not what matters. What matters is how I feel in that clothing. In all of the following examples, I feel beautiful, yet the sizes of the clothing I am wearing vary a good bit. Why should we assess the beauty of our figures based on how a particular company cuts their clothing? The size on a clothing label issued by a company distributing product to a nameless, faceless audience does not determine your level of fitness, health, or beauty. Human beings are incredible because of our diversity, and part of that diversity is rooted in our physical appearances. When a clothing company produces a product, they choose a single measurement from which each item is cut and then distribute millions of replicas based on that number in the hopes that some part of our incredibly varied population of shapes and sizes might deem them an acceptable fit. They don’t care about individual characteristics that make a person unique, so why should individuals care if their measurements are not right for them? They shouldn’t. You shouldn’t. There should be no embarrassment attached to having to wear a size 10 jeans because you are curvy. Instead, there should be some pride in the fact that you don’t fit a mold that some money-grubbing business indiscriminately attached to a size.
I go out to eat with friends or family pretty regularly. I am usually the last to order, so once the waitress gets to me, she has already noted a variety of unmodified meals from the menu. I always begin my order by saying, “Please don’t hate me for this…” I can feel her thinking about how hard she would like to roll her eyes the moment that I say this. I look at the others at the table, and they nonchalantly avoid eye contact with me. They know that I will have a “complicated” order, and they are secretly praying that the waitress does not add “extra ingredients” to their meals just because they are at the same table as me. I feel like I am under the gun, and hastily spit out my order: the 6 oz steak, a double side of broccoli instead of fries, with absolutely no butter, and a side salad with no cheese, croutons, or dressing. After the waitress leaves, I generally hear, “What’s the point of wasting your money on that?” Yes, I am embarrassed. I can feel my face flushing from the heat of the imaginary limelight under which I have been placed for making a the atypical decision against ordering the restaurant's signature meals. I look at my husband and whisper, “I wish I could eat like a normal person.” Immediately, I regret my choice of words. The statement is untrue. In reality, there is no reason that I would have changed my order if I did not feel as though I was being judged negatively by those around me. I would have made myself the same meal at home and felt no qualms about it, whatsoever. Furthermore, the statement is absolutely illogical. How, exactly, does a normal person eat? In Japan, a “normal” person might snack on wasp crackers, much like a child would eat a chocolate chip cookie. In Africa, some people like the crisp, crunchy, apple-like flavor of stink bugs. In South America, your adorable pet guinea pig, Wilbur, might be served to you whole and roasted on a bed of vegetables. (Read more here: http://www.hostelworld.com/blog/the-50-weirdest-foods-from-around-the-world) Before I add any further stress on your gag reflex, I will stop there. You get the point. There is no normal way to eat. So why do we, as Americans, assume that if we are not partaking in the greasy, fat-filled, carbohydrate-rich treats featured in every restaurant’s menu, that we are not eating normally? If you research typical meals from around the world, most of them consist of deliciously fresh veggies, lean, grilled meats, and “good” carbs. Meanwhile, the average meal in the United States is cited as consisting of a cheeseburger and fries. Is this stereotyping? Maybe. However, in most stereotypes, there is some truth. (Read more here: http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/food-and-drink/what-people-eat-for-dinner-around-the-world-a6732036.html) Americans eat poorly, and furthermore, we have eaten poorly for so many generations, that it is actually considered abnormal to make healthy meal choices. People are also intrinsically motivated to be accepted by their peers, and will make choices for the sake of fitting in, sometimes even at the risk of their own health. This is a lethal combination in a society in which superficiality rules most of our decisions, and it has led us to earn the title of the “fattest country on Earth.” The good news is that a paradigm shift seems to be happening in our country. More and more, we see restaurants listing calorie content right on the menu and offering “lighter” fare. This is a tiptoe in the right direction, but by no means a leap. Often, these meal choices are segregated to their own section of the menu, or forced to carry some symbolic indication that they are healthy choices (you know, right next to the indicators that tell you that you will probably die if you are allergic to peanuts and eat it, or that you’ll get e coli if you order it under cooked). This still attaches abnormality to the meal itself. The fact is that we need to eliminate this concept of what “normal” eating looks like. To do so means to stop judging people for what they choose to consume. If you are with someone at a restaurant, and they choose to order the grilled chicken salad with only chicken and lettuce, please refrain from diverting your eyes away from the waitress in silent disapproval. Believe me, it is not silent in the least, and your single, reproachful glance could be the difference between that person continuing to eat healthily or giving up on good nutrition altogether. |
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August 2017
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